That’s Cold

All I keep seeing is a cold sea (see)


and just the tips of far huger things calved off of even more monumental things

and the floodwaters rise

I cannot get through to the upper decks where there is help

instead of this sure and certain tomb



Is this correct?


Not so good at keeping it in perspective

but your opulence won’t save your soul, on the contrary…

your movies are here today, gone tomorrow

if they are good stories

they will just remake them anyway

and make someone else a star

but yet you still think I’ve got a thing for Leonardo DiCaprio?

Or that I want to be a star?

Do I idolize you so much I think I am you?

Never were good at relationships or keeping it in perspective

like what it is really ALL ABOUT

like the STORY

obviously even at the end you are still highly delusional in your top hats and coat tails with your fine ball room gowns in the finest of silk who can’t stop drinking Champagne long enough to put on life jackets and take very real threats to ALL seriously.

To treasure hunters:

A story shall you be given

the jewel you seek

falls to the deep!

But quite a story huh?

How about you and your kind learn something instead of just serving yourselves and your egos, making a whole lot of money and thinking you are God itself? How about never discriminate against others again? How about helping each other EQUALLY without prejudice?

Can you do that O’ Ancient Mariners?


To Plead the 5th

“One cannot be compelled to be a witness against oneself,” the 5th amendment to the US Constitution states.


“You have the right to remain silent” is sounding like the warning that comes with movies: “Any likeness to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.”

Upside down star

Let’s think about this shall we?

If one were, say compelled to be a witness against oneself, we’d get all the murderers and child molesters off the streets in one fell swoop, and bring home many of the milk carton kids- or at least allow their parents to have closure, now wouldn’t we? I mean, if its left up to someone else to clean up your shit for you we’re never going to catch the Jeffrey Dahmer’s and pimps. But what can compel people to turn themselves in?

See, if you ACCEPT God creates all and ultimately manipulated you into doing bad things to others, it becomes easier to be truthful about it, because you no longer feel it is all your fault and you have to save just your own ass.

Also if you ACCEPT God creates all and ultimately manipulated others into doing bad things to others, if becomes easier to be nicer to people and more compassionate, which in turn, will make them more likely to turn themselves in- knowing they will receive fair and just treatment at your hands- hopefully. Its called “forgiveness”- heard of it? Comes from knowing God itself.

Don’t shelter the Devil aka God itself when it does bad and mistreats you so therefore you mistreat others. If you ain’t thinking right, it isn’t necessarily your fault and you could be just God’s latest victim to blame when it manipulates you into hurting others. Recognize the warning signs and get on a better path! Turn the asshole in before it kills and after!

Don’t keep blaming yourselves for your “father’s” abuse!  It’s abusive within itself!!!

Save the future Robin Williams’ of the world today and admit whose fault his death is:

Two Sides To Every Story & 1/2 the Story Has Never Been Told

One World, One God Yes, when God told you there was only one god, that means only one God- not that you are God nor that there is an actual other entity that is evil. All from one source and nothing is independent of such in any shape form or fashion.

Much like skateboarding and trying kickflips, though you’ve had some darn nice tries at monotheism and know what you are trying for in your mind (somewhat?), but you have to land on it and roll away… Do you know what falling is and that there is a certain amount of failure almost anyone goes through prior to success (think Edison)? 


My initials- My name is also synonymous with skateboard wheels...

My initials- My name is also synonymous with skateboard wheels…



Infamous (or should be) Quotes from The Bondage Queen

En Parte- June & July 2013:

“And as the Range Con is, you are too- always wanting a one-size fits all solution to every problem, but this is without recognizing to begin with that the world is very diverse.”

“But I am the anti-Christ. See, God loved Jesus, God raped me using you. Always more OBVIOUS who is in control when it goes against ever single wish & desire that you have EVER had. But I guess you’ve never been mentally RAPED day in & day out for decades so you just blame the innocent victim.”

“Can’t imagine that anyone would have anything IMPORTANT or worthwhile to do with these gifts you’ve been so freely given can you? & Fame & fortune so squandered by the likes of you, that even though yourself would so partake in such a feast of gluttony, you NEVER could see the USE in such. Well, maybe that is because you’re not altogether too useful yourself & seem to be squandering quite a lot including this ENTIRE PLANET.”

“God & religions sure are popular, but that is a partial truth. About 10% of what God does & is is shown there while the other 90% keeps shooting heroin & making porns with CHILDREN in the backroom.”

“I think you are still missing the point. Why do you excuse your violent behavior? You missing a player? How about the MOTHERFUCKING DEALER of the damn cards who so much justifies inequality in your minds? Luck? Genius huh? This is why its REFLECTION is everywhere you look & in imbued in every aspect of our existence. God created all. That is who it is. Same one who told people different stories, having them believe different things and killing/subjugating them for thousands of years. Same one who created slavery & treated women that way for apparently caring for its children & giving birth (probably without orgasm unlike SOMEONE else) so you should NEVER blame yourselves personally though. Oh those black people are just all what we looked like & where we came from, lets treat them subhumanly for CENTURIES & those damn Jews were the ones who came up with the whole 1 GOD theory (though in practical application they didn’t follow through) and this is pretty much the God you all know & apparently LOVE- that is if you think it exists. Why can’t you put the TWO together ever? God creates all. This is the planet & people & actions and thoughts it created. You just “lovin’ it” or would you like to actually know where that hamburger you’ve been eating actually came from? Might want to know if you were just stuffing your face in the drive through- destroying the entire planet in complete oblivion. That hamburger is today but the effects those cows have will last many, many lifetimes for people who will never see that hamburger.”

“If you actually LOVED your kids you wouldn’t do that. But you love the thoughts your opinions more than LIFE ITSELF-somehow justifying it all with THOUGHT. Because life was SCREAMING STOP.”

“If your inspiration comes from “the muse” you are really saying you believe in magic like things/thoughts just “magically” apparating out of nowhere- instead of actually having defined source and MEANING”

“Once I turned into an Indian in Shoshone Basin, seeing all the inheritance doled out to every child who would know the history & this land- which gets fewer & fewer, this is how I told it to myself- but that story’s summary stays long past the ghosts of sagebrush & bunchgrasses & springs forgotten about…Ask an Indian what things are. They don’t know. But you sure did wound them for LIFE over it.”

“So the Ents never did figure out this PLOT actually concerned them, nor did the steward left to govern the place care much about what anyone else said only following what was in his mind, not in front of his face as the old king continued to only hold council with Wormtongue itself tell him how worthless people are & with such little potential. Funny how you are so blown out of proportion in all the wrong places.”

“Some people needed plastic surgery for REAL REASONS- not just the fake plastic BS YOU use it for.”

“Spreading misery & hate throughout the world isn’t tough. Last I heard you don’t even have to make an effort, you just drive through & place your order. Don’t even have to get out of the vehicle. Moo!”

“The moment you get to despising others- just as I do you- is the moment you are under complete control of EVIL itself. & You would be so quick to say Lucifer in the scene was EVIL, but how about that angel saying the other entity was completely worthless & should be annihilated? If that ain’t EVIL- for God to create someone- it creates us all- just to have us think that each other should not exist & to make it our life’s goal to DESTROY such I don’t know what is.”

” Why do people like Hello Kitty? The cat doesn’t even have its own comic or cartoon. All about those feelings which seem to be buying a bunch of plastic crap and destroying the entire planet while no one can have a real discussion about the elephant in the room- your out of control personal desires about having more kids. & You want guns & violence too? Think it is “cool” or “justified”? Of course. But you should know that GOD is the one who creates all & if you like it that is because God made you like it. This is verily the source to (all being and) porn too. Might want to think about who is watching the next time you get sexy & where gay really comes from before flying those flags too high.”

“Why is it every time I say I’m actually someone- like Peter Pan- it is “insane” but when you dress up in my clothes it’s OK- particularly if completely unrelated to your actual physical reality on this planet?”

“You ask for a ocean liner but refuse to give others a seat in a life boat.”

“(You) Couldn’t imagine another use for nature itself lest it be to cut the forest down, to graze the cow upon it. Like burning down the bank for the cash in the ATM though, I think you really are missing/destroying a lot for very little return.”

“You do realize given the predictability of your behavior at this present time if anyone ever gets who I am I’ll be shot right?”

“You enable a madman by your blind greed & unwillingness to see things from anywhere else other than your perspective at the time.”

“Your WHOLE system of valuing other humans lives and experiences is kind of screwed up. Not like I’m saying that you shouldn’t place some value on the positive- you should- but you seem to be entirely missing that other end of the spectrum. Some people are born winners, they have great parents that are financially stable and good looking & smart they didn’t have to be locked in a closet while their mom turned tricks & did heroin, or be abused at the hands of countless selfish men whom Mom continued to let in because of the “love” she got from them. But yet the person who is good looking & smart & athletic will get special preferential treatment in this life- more people will like them, they will get more praise throughout school and for their talents of which they have plenty of & opportunities to demonstrate them to others because their parents had no problem in paying for sports or being there to drive them to them & even practice with them. Maybe they even get to go to a world class camp in whatever their interest is making them all the more talented at whatever they were interested & earning them more praise. (Meanwhile) the “evil” twin, locked in some heroin addict’s closet ain’t learning a damn thing sitting in the dark wondering what they did wrong. And this is how inequality breeds more of the same.”


God is the Greatest Magician of All

Though it is widely thought

that thoughts are under your control


where do they go when you aren’t thinking them?

where do they go sometimes when you go to look for them?


and moments pass

maybe hours

maybe days

the thought

whatever you forgot

still not there

then it magically


out of nowhere!


How is this possible

no one apparently ever bothered to ask

or thought that


the arriving of life

from nothing


was the source

and such an intricate complexity

as life itself

with all the different parts that all work

chalked up only

to random chance


complexity of this level

all following some basic blueprints

leads me to believe

it is more purposeful than just which ever way the lincoln logs fell

and it is also the same entity

as it keeps following the same plan

over and over

starting with the same basic materials


if it were so easy for the logs the fall just the right way

the molecules to align

then wouldn’t life exist elsewhere?

wouldn’t our planet itself have more chances than just the one

which we now believe all life came originally from


multiple origins of many types of organisms?


and why is it that when you are thinking

that thought that you forgot

that all your other thoughts



into thin air?

For where do they go

you take it for granted

they will be right back


Just around the corner were they?


The problem with this is that you


take for granted

that trillions of bytes of information

are automatically just stored in your head

but God gives you whatever it wants back

not what you want

this is why some kids don’t do well in school

have problems remembering information

and some people have photographic memory

these things are independent of the biological medium

the brain, the eyes, the ears, for most are the same

it is the playback of this information that God gives you

(how else are you to store so much in a brain that is 99% chimpanzee

and have come so extraordinarily far just in the last 400 years in terms of thought and knowlege

while your genetic makeup has remained unchanged from the days you were banging two rocks together)

sometimes this playback is excellent

sometimes it doesn’t even exist at all

“in one ear, out the other” it is called


and though it is widely thought

that thought controls your actions

all people experience a phenomenon

in which they speak before thinking at all

often later regretful

especially if this conflicts with the sense of morality they think they possess


for a little while as a kid I had a stuttering problem

that just appeared out of nowhere

my mom told me to think about what I was going to say

before I said it

and I did for a while

but really it is more of a simultaneous process

in which life happens

and there is the illusion of control as well as the familiar pattern you fit into

and you just talk

you don’t really think about it

most of the time

(look closely at your own responses especially to other people’s questions- often this is very automated really)


And if I tell you to imagine

a bowl of chocolate ice cream

on a sunny day

and how it would taste

can you?

But does the bowl of ice cream exist in reality?


Why is it that songs get stuck in people’s heads

who are totally tone deaf

and can’t hold a beat on their own?


But no

thoughts do not just magically apparate

and we haven’t just magically become extreme

innovators and creators

extraordinary dreamers

compared to the chimp

with a stick eating ants.


God is quicker than the eye

for this is how fast a thought moves

and through what medium?

if any to reach us?

becoming us?

but electrical in nature

it seems


And as I’ve learned with my prolonged experience first hand with God

it can put anything it wants

as your thought

don’t want to think it?

too bad.


It is not from healthy people

we have learned so much about medicine

from peace

about the human body and genome

but from the sick and injured

and when God takes over my thoughts

replacing them with things I don’t appreciate

this is certainly a form of sickness

like getting cancer

but it also tells us

how normal healthy people



God thinks nice thoughts for you

every day

never does it forget your name (unless you get amnesia or Alzheimer)

and it always remembers whose memories are whose

and yes

perhaps you should be more appreciative of what you got

totally taken for granted.

(but then it won’t take responsibility for the bad thoughts, and has had people worship a false idol- itself who is not so perfect after all- so you’re probably even-steven by not feeling/thinking anything at all about it)


If God is giving you good thoughts

and if your thoughts are not so good

people themselves really aren’t to blame

or to praise

it is just whatever rabbit the magician wants to pull out of the hat for you

sometimes a bunny rabbit

but sometimes a lion trying to eat you or others.


There really isn’t a lot of control over the entire thing

you can agree

you can disagree

and this is what most people do

agree with whatever thought God places in front of you

unless it gets to be disagreeable

then you fight it.


Common forms of disagreeable thoughts

God tortures people with

include addiction

telling people to have another drink

snort another line

puff another smoke

all the while

hurting them

God does

them blames it on them

or says it was “a disease”

but sure as hell

wasn’t God putting repetitive thoughts in your head

effectively reducing your life to nothing

thought by thought by thought

until you finally act

on what it says

even though

you know it is killing you.

Giving Them The Finger

And one finger

not good enough

not good enough

Photo by adam crowe- Flickr

For one finger is used to point

to blame (each other, God…)

to draw attention to something (ourselves, God, the crimes…)

to pretend to point and shoot.

Index finger pointing upward

was a sign in the Grateful Dead parking lot

you needed a “miracle”

that is a free ticket

if there were any available

to get in to see the show (I got in to “see the show”, the show is you, me the world, our history, and God is just using us, sometimes good, but a lot of bad ends- and you, clueless that it is all an act of God, you got in to see the show too I see- but from a different angle)

The middle finger pointing up

and towards someone

tells them to fuck off

and here we are in the middle

of life itself

and I believe God told me to fuck off

also called “giving them the bird”

coincidentally my only real boyfriend

only 9 months

was named Bird

and we did lots of fucking

but then the ghost of such experiences

has haunted me the past 20 years

with any star God wanted use at the time

mentally fucking me….

really gave me the bird

on that one

didn’t you God?

There is always the ring finger

to symbolize everlasting love

I’m married to God

it sucks

it has total control over my sexuality

inside and out

unless you call

the only guy I’ve had sex with

since I met God

named Adam

who had a really big dick

and I bled for a week from

just coincidence

and me raping myself

on my part
Thumb out is hitchhiking

this concept has been explained elsewhere

and we are trying to GET OFF THE ROAD

so just a thumb itself

will not do

and you can do your own footwork

on what the pinky alone is

So we are going for two fingers

(which I coincidentally broke this year)

peace brothers and sisters


Photo by bitzi ☂ ion-bogdan dumitrescu- Flickr

So we are going for two fingers

one to symbolize ourself

a single individual

or the human race

and one to represent God

but not so close

a bit distant please

(as God really is a rapist, a murder, a liar, a thief)

or it could represent me

and you

but not so close

we should be friends

not lovers

a little distance

or it could represent

the two Gods

one as it as always been

you are just at a failure to recognize

where you are at

(maybe not such a bad thing since it was just going to continue doing what it does)

and one as God should be

actually compassionate and wise

instead of just putting up a false front

and propigating all kinds of other things in the back room.

And perhaps there will be two humans as well

the animal people who came before

which you are now

a violent sort of dreamer

always thinking they were in control

while being the furthest from it

and tomorrow maybe

you won’t be completely insane

as an entire human race

that is spiraling


to its self inflicted doom.

As God Is Known, So Is Woman

Though God may not give you the answers, you can certainly learn from your mistakes. 

Jesus Christ’s knowledge of God
is like his knowledge of women

though he’d seen them in passing
and knew what they were for
in the interest of his career and image
they were never thought of in that way
and if so, surely never spoken of.

  • For is love, are women, or any relationship trouble? Surely, but that is no reason to forgo the entire experience and think of it as “dirty”. We may be dirty, but we clean up real nice.

Buddha’s knowledge of God
is like his knowledge of women

he didn’t pay any attention
or value what he had
in search of better
while totally denying any responsibility
let alone time or involvement
in the family he created.

  • Love the one you’re with! What you have got, be it big or small, we all have roles and responsibilities to other human beings on this planet, which should come 1st before your own selfish interests. 3 lives are more important than just 1. Work with what you have got even though you may not have chosen it yourself.

Mohammad’s knowledge of God 
is like his knowledge of women

he couldn’t find the keys to the front door (clitoris)
let alone the one just inside the gate (g-spot)
though he had many chances
and you all thought he was an outstanding success
as life went on.

  • Sometimes it is more important to share joy than to hoard it all to yourself.

All of the above we are all guilty of, for the woman and God: we thought we knew all about- but we didn’t, we had what was important already- but kept searching for better, and if by chance we ever came across the truth about the whole thing, we would have been too embarrassed to relate such to others, let alone again to ourselves.

And this whole conversation is absolutely incomplete without the following caveat:

And someday maybe women not such a mystery, just as God.

But only if you listen to her.